Should I let him cry without checking at bedtime?
Many parents wonder if they should let a baby cry at bedtime without checking on him. That is a very personal decision. It is important for you, as apparent, to do what is comfortable for you and that aligns with your values. What we know about approaches that involve infant crying is that they are effective in the vast majority of infants. We also know that they are not harmful in terms of attachment or development. We know, too, that they help families function better because you as the parents are sleeping better and often the baby is less irritable. In terms of checking or not checking, that is up to the parent. There is not really any evidence to suggest that one way is better than the other, so it is a matter of what is more comfortable for you as a parent. Consistency is also key.
Also, pay attention to how your baby responds to checks. Sometimes a baby is really soothed by checks while other babies become more upset after having a parent come into the room to intervene.
If you do not physically go into the room to check on your little one to see if he is okay, be sure you are able to monitor him in some way (for instance, a video monitor) to make sure that he is not upset due to something like having an arm or foot stuck between the crib rails.
About Dr. Sarah Honaker